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Friends, family and neighbors – the do-gooders who are always willing to give you advice about your life. Ever wonder why, when you are about to take a leap of faith into something awesome, your friends, family and neighbors are all too eager to warn you of the pitfalls. I call it the “Get By Rule”. What’s this you ask? Well, if you asked your friend for $1500.00 to pay the bills and feed your kids b/c you were down and out, your friend, brother, sister, neighbor would most likely say “Sure Thing – Always Here to Help a Friend in Need.” They are happy to help you GET BY. After all, being charitable makes people feel good. So does knowing they are in a better position than you – it’s a sense of accomplishment.

Now, ask the same person for $1500.00 to start a new business and they’ll spend time telling you about how many people fail at “those things”, about the times that they failed, that only a few people succeed in business, etc. etc. They’ll ramble on giving you tails of unsubstantiated BS to deter you. And, they won’t lend you the money. Why? Because although they are willing to help you Get By they aren’t willing to have you PASS THEM BY. It’s as simple as that.

This became so clear to me after listening to Caroline Myss’ audio program Invisible Acts of Power. What invariably sets the people who succeed apart from those who never take a chance is the decision to move forward towards their goals regardless of what other people think. My personal success has evolved by choosing carefully who I am willing to take advice from. When someone wants to offer me advice, direction or guidance, I simply look at the results the person is getting in that area of their life and decide whether or not I’m going to choose to listen to them. For example: If someone wants to give me financial or business advice, I look at the level of success that person has had in business or financially, and then I’ll choose whether or not to take on their advice/direction. I personally wouldn’t take advice from someone making less than $100K a month. I wouldn’t have someone with no experience in real estate tell me how to invest in it.

If you are about to venture into a business, decide what you want and go for it. Don’t allow your friends, family and neighbors to prevent you from passing them by. Many people simply fail in MLM because the company they are with tells them to go out to their friends, family and neighbors – the black cloud of success. Doing so, for the person who chooses to NOT be deflated, can be very profitable. It can also be the kiss of death if that is your only way of marketing. When selecting a company to work with, choose a company with a well formulated system and marketing plan. One that teachers you how to advertise in a wide variety of media to get your phone ringing with people eager to speak with you. And if you need to borrow the money to start your business, use the money you’d pay your bills with and ask your friend for money to pay your bills!

Copyright 2010 Shannon Lavenia